In board with grammar

What is with you people up here? "We had to stand on line for 10 minutes at Starbucks!" That is not American. You can stand IN line for 10 minutes; you can be visiting starbucks.com ONLINE for 10 minutes. But you are not physically on a line ... unless you've managed to convince your linemates to pass you above their heads, forming a sort of impromptu Starbucks crowd surfing phenomenon.

Also, stop saying "supposably."

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This is going to be a new feature of the blog: "Did Phillip get touched unnecessarily by a stranger on the subway today'?"

The answer today is yes. The woman sitting on the bench by me stood up as the train approached her stop and grabbed onto the pole I was holding on to. When I say "grabbed onto the pole I was holding on to" I mean she grabbed my hand. And held it until I moved it lower ... and then her hand fell down to mine.

Can someone seriously explain this to me? Why all the touching? I thought New York was supposed to be cold and isolating. So far it's been uncomfortably warm and rife with inappropriate togetherness.